She came and She stripped away every single piece of me. She left me raw, broken, crying, hurting, shaking on the floor with nowhere left to run. My thinking had abandoned me and I could no longer run there. There were no other people available in that moment for me to hide behind. There was just me.. And Her. And in that second She looked like the most beautiful and the most terrifying thing I had ever seen. And I have known Her for a long time. She IS me after all. Just as She is all else. And I stood before Her, quivering, desperately wanting to run to her, but frozen in time, unable to move, my heart beating so loud I could hear nothing but the drumming of it in my chest. And in that moment, I felt something familiar, something I knew.. Something. I felt something. And it wasn’t something with a name or a label, or a set of instructions… It was something bigger and deeper than the words. It was something Real. It was something True. It was Life. And in that moment She came to me, and She was in me, and through me and with me, and all the fear and the pain and the tension and the sorrow fell out of me, and in Her it became music and light and passion and art and beauty and dance and I saw it was all part of the bigger picture.. The art only the Gods are able to see clearly. For we are part of the great dance, part of the picture, we cannot see it for we are IN it. And I want to play my part well. I want to keep showing up and being all that is asked of me. And sometime the most beautiful, moving, transformative pieces of a masterpiece are the ones that rip you to shreds and smash you so far open that you are never the same afterwards. That’s good art. The pieces that touch you so deeply you are forever changed. And in that moment, She smiled, because She saw I understood. That I knew all I needed to know. And I smiled too, for I saw the parts had all been played absolutely perfectly, precisely, and with grace, honour and love. And I sent thanks via the heart threads to those who shared the stage with me, and then I lay back, and enjoyed the peace before the next act. For this show is never done… This show of life. It is always in all ways. It never ends. No, this is the eternal dance. Sometimes we are centre stage, and sometimes we are in the wings, waiting for our big moments, and sometimes we are witness to other people’s scenes to give them the perspective they cannot see from the place in the cast.. But step back further, and there are the stage hands and lighting engineers and sound people and ticket merchants, and the people who built the building, and the ones who formed the idea, and you see none of it is more or less important than any other part of it.. We need it ALL to create the Whole. So, to quote someone else’s wisdom “We all become important, when we realise our goal should be to figure out our role within the context of the whole..” So what’s my act? What’s my magic show? What’s my part? And will I bring it? Will I be it? In All its aspects? I will keep striving to be the very best I can be, for God is watching, and I want to give Her a good show. For one day, I will go Home to Her, and I want Her to say “You did good, my Love, you did good.”
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