I am in the belly of the whale, and I do not know where it is taking me.
Any choice in surrender has been taken out of my hands and into the guts of a Divine carrier, encompassing me within its flesh with the warmth and nourishment of the womb of the Mother.
And there is peace here. Despite the deafening noise of the chewing to pieces and digestion and processing of the world around me, there is peace. Amongst all the movement, all the change, all the comings and goings beyond my control and seeming comprehension, there is a stillness.
I am still, and yet I am constantly moving.
Life is taking me through the waves, safely held within its grasp.
And so I await the next rebirth, and the next, and the next.
For it is a never-ending process of birth, death and rebirth.
How will I be born next?
What will have been shed and what will have grown?
What form shall the flight take this time?
For I will fly; be it on the back of the dragon, or through the veins of my being, I will fly. Sailing with the fiery grounding of the breath.
I shall not stay tethered to the lines that seek to hold me, for I am held by the matter of Nature. I have no need for the straight when the waves, the spirals are the driving force, and the net provides the Divine with a playing field within me to dance and swing and clamber and slide and climb upon.
I am held.
From the inside out, I am held.
And so I sit within the confines of the Beast, knowing that just for now, it’s boundaries are the way to greater freedom, accepting the simplicity of my surroundings and grateful for the protection from the bellowing of the world outside.
I do not wish to be low inside, but sometimes going down is the only way to reach the place that catapults us into the next arising.
And I will rise.
For as the phoenix finds life in the ashes, I find the spark within the darkness. I seek the jewel within the blackness that shines with the depth only the darkest night may bring. The exquisite sheen of a stone drenched in the oceanic reaches of Knowing, its beauty fleeting as the Sun fades it back into the Unknowing.
But the secret of the Unknown, the thing we fear most, is its limitless potential. The potency of the lessened limits so strong we fear we may be rendered lifeless by its power. Oh what fallacy this is. The Unknown seeks only to welcome us to its Mystery, for not all can be Known or what would ever be the point? Where would be the joy? Where would be the discovery and the seeking and the glorious anticipation?
Where would be the breaks for the Light to get in?
Where would be the darkness for the colour to become?
Where would be the space for love to fill?
And each separation is a preparation; a void for more to be.
Each time between is an invitation back into the heart of the matter so that we may become again enlivened and enriched as we are birthed back from time within the embrace of the Creator.
So be created.